Because procuring white children the natural way prevents them from adopting foreign babies and subsequently saving the world just a little bit more, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have devised an ingenious way for their rumored babies to benefit others: they want to sell the confirmation.
Us magazine is reporting that the couple will grant the specifics of the pregnancy to the tabloid offering the most money. Then they will donate those ill-gotten proceeds to charity. Why “ill-gotten”? Well, we tend to get very weirded out by body commodification, especially when we’re talking about tremendously wealthy people who can afford to not put prices on their and their family’s heads. And while this is mostly a case of information about a body being valuable, it still seems slightly off.
Far be it from us, though. And we guess we can get behind anything that makes the competition between the tabloids look even stupider. Happy auctioning, you two!